Anxiety! If you grew up with an emotionally abusive or toxic parent, you may have some form of emotional abuse related anxiety. And that anxiety may be up and down, intense or dull, or everywhere in between depending on many factors.
This article will address ways to manage anxiety in the aftermath of parental emotional abuse. These tips are not meant to be a substitute for medical or mental health treatment.
What Does Parental Emotional Abuse Related Anxiety Look Like
Anxiety can manifest in different ways, including constant worrying, panic attacks, and physical symptoms such as chest tightness or difficulty breathing. The anxiety can be triggered by feeling judged, criticized, confused, or any other number of circumstances that remind you (consciously or unconsciouly) of your emotionally abusive parent. However, there are effective strategies for managing anxiety and reducing its impact on our daily lives.
If you’re an adult child of a parent with narcissistic or toxic traits, it’s important to recognize that your anxiety is a valid response to your experiences.
I’m going to say that again:
Parental emotional abuse can lead to a pervasive sense of insecurity, self-doubt, and hyper-vigilance that can trigger anxiety symptoms. Remember, it’s not your fault that you’re feeling anxious, and it’s okay to seek help.
Tips for Managing Anxiety After Parental Emotional Abuse
There are many ways to cope with anxiety, and what works for one person may not work for another. Below are some suggestions to help manage anxiety:
Grounding Techniques
Grounding techniques can help you stay present and focused on the present moment, reducing the sense of overwhelm and disconnection that anxiety can cause. Try these simple techniques to ground yourself:
- Focus on your breathing: Take slow, deep breaths, and focus on the sensation of air moving in and out of your body.
- Use your senses: Focus on what you can see, hear, touch, taste, and smell around you. Notice the details of your surroundings.
- Engage in physical movement: Take a walk, stretch, or do some light exercise to get your body moving and release tension.
- Use visualization: Imagine yourself in a peaceful place, such as a beach or a forest, and focus on the details of the scenery.
Self-care Practices
Self-care is crucial for managing parental emotional abuse related anxiety. Taking care of your physical and emotional needs can help reduce stress and promote relaxation. Here are some self-care practices to consider:
- Prioritize sleep: Aim for 7-8 hours of sleep per night and establish a consistent sleep routine.
- Exercise regularly: Exercise releases endorphins, which can help improve mood and reduce anxiety.
- Eat a healthy diet: Eating a balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, and whole grains can help improve energy levels and reduce stress.
- Practice relaxation techniques: Try meditation, yoga, or other relaxation techniques that you find helpful.
Seeking Support
Seeking support can be incredibly helpful for managing anxiety. Talking to a trusted friend, family member, or therapist can help you feel heard and validated, and they can offer helpful feedback and coping strategies. Here are some tips for finding the right support:
- Consider seeing a therapist who specializes in working with adult children of narcissistic parents.
- Join a support group for survivors of emotional abuse.
- Reach out to friends or family members who you feel safe talking to about your experiences.
Challenging Negative Thoughts
One common symptom of anxiety is negative self-talk. Negative thoughts can worsen anxiety and lead to feelings of hopelessness and helplessness. Challenging negative thoughts can help reframe your thinking and reduce anxiety. Here are some strategies to try:
- Identify the negative thought: Notice when you’re thinking negatively, and write down the thought.
- Challenge the thought: Ask yourself if the thought is accurate and evidence-based. Is there an alternative way to think about the situation?
- Reframe the thought: Try to reframe the negative thought into a more positive or neutral statement. For example, if you’re thinking “I’m not good enough,” try reframing it to “I’m doing the best I can, and that’s enough.”
Managing anxiety in the aftermath of parental emotional abuse can be challenging, but with the right strategies and support, it’s possible to reduce its impact on your daily life. Remember to acknowledge the source of your anxiety, practice self-care, seek support, and challenge negative thoughts. It’s also important to remember that healing from emotional abuse takes time and patience, but with persistence and self-compassion, it’s possible to move forward and create a healthier, happier life.
If you need support managing your anxiety, I’d be happy to provide a consult to see how I might be able to help. You can book that here. For those living in Arizona, I offer individual and group counseling. For those living anywhere, I provide educational, supportive, and experiential wellness services.
